BRIAN’S BACK!!!

About time and a glowing example of the fact you can’t keep a good man down. In association with Planet Rock, the radio station that ensures the Aged Rocker is kept calm and tranquil as each day passes, their gentle digital strains soothing the AR fevered brow, has called upon Brian Johnson the now ex-AC/DC frontman to present a radio show….couldn’t think of a better man to do the job!!! And as I’ve already said Brian should be the new Top Gear presenter instead of that talentless ginger to@£pot.

 

Planet Rock already employ the sophisticated sounds and services of the debonair rocker Alice Cooper so engaging the shy and retiring Geordie gentleman is not only logical, it also means ‘rods’ to Brian’s ex-employers and the wheelchair bound fat tw&t that’s usurped his rightful place in life.

 

All the best Brian and bloody good on ya, the old AR himself already convinced Brian’s show will be as ‘smooth as a gravy sandwich’. Oh and by the way, Brian’s on this Sunday night so get yer DAB tuned in nice and early. In fact if your radio isn’t turned into Planet Rock….why the hell not? It should be mandatory so get on with it.

 

Rock on and thanks Planet Rock. Nice to see someone out there in rock land still has some good old common bloody sense!!! All we now need is for Brian, Jeremy Clarkson and the Aged Rocker to band together for a motors and music program…..now that just would be a show worth watching wouldn’t it?

TRUCKIN’ HELL

 

Out and about on his travels the old Aged Rocker is always on the alert for something that appeals to him. And so it was as he made his way along the A59 on his way into deepest, darkest Yorkshire. Sat on the forecourt of what looked like a disused garage sat three of the most iconic, rock’n’roll, hardcore classic vehicles you or the AR will be fortunate enough to ever sling their respective backsides behind the wheel of.

 

 

If there’s a motor out there that oozes style and makes the ultimate ‘couldn’t give a flying f$#k’ attitude statement it’s a 50’s American stepside pickup. Built like the proverbial Sherman tank and about as forgiving, Chevrolet, Ford, International, Studebaker, GMC and Dodge all made them and they all featured the exact same thing. That superb stepside profile and the ability to last to a degree if you hits an American 50’s pickup wing with a lump hammer you won’t make a dent. Nothing but nothing is built like one of these trucks. And don’t be put off by the light surface rust or various coats of paint, it doesn’t make the slightest difference. In fact it adds to the appeal!

 

 

 

Fitted with a variety of engines from 4 or 6 cylinder straights to big bruiser V8’s all usually mated to a column shift 3-speed transmission, these Yank commercials more often than not outlasted their first, second and third owners. Whether you fancy a full restoration, fit new running gear but leave the bodywork as a rustoration, go rat rod or full low rider custom complete with a short block Chevy with four on the floor, throw the Mopar book at it, drop in a big turbo Cummins diesel or drag it up with big chrome rims and a SoCal airbrush paint job, its all OK with a 50’s pickup.

 

 

This trio of trucks over in Yorkshire were all Ford F-100 of varying ages plus some mobile numbers to call if you’re so interested. As to whether they still had an engine who knows or better still, who cares. Get a proper gas flowed V8, a decent auto shift, power steering, some wide mag alloys or deep dish steels and a straight thru onboard and apart from some instrumentation of your personal choice and a proper mega watt hifi, you’ll be ready to blister some tarmac or look the mutt’s nuts on a summer evening’s cruise. Just think of it, a pair of Steve McQueen shades, an Oily Rag t-shirt, Redwing boots, a soft pack of Camel with a Zippo and Joe Satriani playing Summer Song….what more do you want?  

 

 

 

 

More years ago than he cares to remember the AR had the good fortune to have to test drive and photograph some of these trucks and came away mighty impressed. Yes, they weigh a bollocks swelling ton to drive, get bloody hot inside, don’t have a single driver aid and drink fuel like a coach load of alcoholics on a bender. They were built to last, turn heads to a degree Italian super car owners get seriously jealous and are without doubt one of the best babe magnets you’ll ever own or drive. There ain’t a chick out there that won’t get it wet and sticky for a rubber burning F-100 and the dude driving it! If not it’ll one of those ball kicker followers that are nothing more than a drain on yer wallet! Well sorted there’s nothing like one of these American trucks be it looks, presence or sheer style and you can guarantee you’ll have one of the best, iron clad investments ever to have four wheels lashed onto it.   

 

 

 

The only thing you need to go with it is an Indian Classic and the contents of your garage is complete. So take the old AR’s advice and go check out these 50’s Fords. The old git guarantees you’ll be heading home with one……….rock on!

 

 

LIGHT FANTASTIC

 

After a day behind the wheel the Aged Rocker likes to unwind with a glass of his favourite bourbon. It’s just unfortunate that one of these best Kentucky Straight whiskies you’ll pour down your neck happens to be called Knob Creek, the creek bits alright but the first part of the name tends to be a cause of much pi@# taking. However, a few minutes spent on the balcony before retiring taking in the last of the evening air is all well and good but if you can’t see anything it can get hard work. Enter the LuminAID Packlite12.

 

To start with it doesn’t need batteries instead a small, inbuilt solar panel that charges up the power source in seven hours the end result being six hours of bright, white light or up to thirty-two if you use one of the lower settings. All you have to do is unclip the securing strap, untwist the rubberised white box, blow some air into it and press the on switch. No matter what you do you won’t break it since it bounces and floats and when you’ve done, open the valve, counter twist the ends and fasten the strap. It’s so easy to use even my girlfriend’s been able to master it!!!!!!

 

 

Humour aside especially since she drinks my bourbon, the Packlite12 is one of those must have, common sense gadgets that really does work. Designed by Andrea Sreshta and Anna Stork, these two architectural students who realised that there was an actual need for a simple, rechargeable, self-contained light, these little lights now form part and parcel of numerous emergency services and disaster relief equipment. For the AR it’s running out of Knob Creek that’s a serious international incident, two, three or maybe even four fingers just the right amount to ease the old git gently into the land of nod and enough to blot out ‘her’ snoring.

 

 

Measuring 110mm when inflated and the same when deflated apart from the fact it becomes only 11mm thick, the great thing is as soon as the sun comes out this little light is instantly recharging itself which also means you don’t have to remember to buy batteries since it doesn’t use ‘em! It’s also a fantastic piece of kit to carry on your motorbike since it’s small enough to fit in your tool roll or top box and if you clamp it to your handlebars or pop it on the seat when you’ve stopped, with the solar panel pointing upwards its busy charging up again. There’s even a little red LED to let you know energy is being gathered.

 

 

Enjoying a final bevy as the day draws to an end is all well and good. But if you trip over your motorbike the night takes on a whole new meaning especially if you’ve spilt yer drink as a result. To get your mitts on your own LuminAID Packlite12 visit www.rohan.co.uk and part with a miserly £19-99p or to check out some of the other LuminAID products go to www.luminAID.com